A 25 year old Canadian was riding a zipline at Flight of the Gibbon in Chiang Mai on Saturday when his safety harness broke and he plummeted 50 meters to the ground. He was pronounced dead at the scene. The weight limit for anyone using the zipline is 125 kilograms. Manager and Thai PBS reported the man weighed between 180 and 200 kilograms, while other outlets said the deceased man weighed 125 kilograms. It was reported the zipline operators have been charged with gross negligence resulting in death. Flight of the Gibbon was investigated in 2017 over claims it had encroached protected forests. In 2015, two Chinese tourists were killed in separate incidents at two other ziplines in the area. In 2016, a Chinese tourists suffered serious injuries while riding the Flying Squirrel zipline and three Israelis were injured in a fall at the Flight of the Gibbon. In 2015, remarkable footage in the Daily Mail went viral after showing an American tourist who was left hanging onto a friend after an employee forget to connect a carabiner on a 400m zipline in Chiang Mai.

I’m often asked about safety and danger in Thailand, so let’s look at a case study with much to teach us:

By the end of the night (around 2 am) as the bar’s customers were leaving. The holidaymakers – believed to be a man in his 40s and his parents, both in their 60s – were attacked by several men earlier this month during Thai new year celebrations in Hua Hin, a coastal town about three hours south of Bangkok, popular with older Europeans. CCTV footage posted online shows a vicious and prolonged assault in a street, which starts when a British man briefly touches shoulders with a Thai man carrying a bottle who appears to push him to the ground. The British woman takes the Thai man to the side and an argument ensues. Several Thai men punch the family until all three are on the ground. When they try to rise, they are kicked in the face and left unconscious before onlookers come to their aid. During the Thai new year’s Songkran festival, also known as the water festival, major streets are taken over by a giant water fight for three days as people party continuously.

If you saw this video of the 2 a.m. bar brawl in Hua Hin you probably wondered about safety in Thailand, particularly after seeing the older farang woman get knocked out. How could that happen in a gentle country supposedly safe for women? Let’s take a look:

1. Per capita, drunk Brits cause 10x more problems here than drunk Thais.
2. Three Brits went to a tough bar area and drank until 2 a.m.
3. One Brit bumped a Thai in the street and the Thai knocked him down.
4. His woman companion long and loudly insulted the Thai.
5. The Thai knocked her and the other Brit down.
6. Friends of the Thai kicked them.
7. the knockdown of the woman caused international outrage.
8. In Thailand a public insult is treated as an attack with a deadly weapon – it is mortal and transcends gender.
9. The public insulter is usually killed on the spot or ambushed the following day by friends of the insultee.
10. The woman is alive because she’s a woman. Had she been a man she’d be dead.
11. By Thai cultural standards the Thai who knocked her down acted in self defense – in the only way possible.
12. His friends were justified in treating the farangs like would-be murderers and kicking them.

The morals of this story are many and one of them is that Thailand has its own culture and sets its own rules of behavior. That’s why, in my books and in the newsletter, I repeatedly warn about arguing with Thais. Don’t do it. Ever. You can almost eliminate danger from your life in Thailand with these simple strategies:

1. Avoid late-night bars in vacation spots that are magnets for young men from around the world looking for trouble.
2. Don’t confront or quarrel with Thais. Ever. Never, ever argue with a Thai. Never.
3. Don’t drive until you understand what you’re getting into. Thai traffic has unique vices and virtues.
4. Be careful in your bathroom. This is the #1 environment where most people are injured. Thai bathrooms can be slippery as hell if you’re showering.

Why ‘Safety First’ in Thailand is… not so much

The notion of safety first in Thailand is novel and exotic. Thais take risks every day that would turn Westerners’ hair white.

What do Thai kindergartners do in school? Coloring, learning words and numbers, of course. And field trips. Like this one where these 3-year-olds each sat on their very own, deadly crocodile while their teachers took this  photograph. Our very own Sathaporn Kindergarten – a private school for children of well-off parents – here in Chiang Mai apologized after the photos went viral. The school was criticized because, among other things, the children attended the show without their parents’  or guardians’ knowledge. The pics were only discovered because the photos were uploaded to the school’s Facebook page titled “Who says crocodiles Aren’t Friendly?” They order things differently in Thailand…

Songkran Festival Safety in Thailand

During the April 11–17 Songkran period last year, 3,690 road accidents killed 390 people and injured 3,808 others.  The Disaster Prevention and Mitigation Department said the death toll was down 11.76 per cent from 2016 (!). This year’s five-day Songkran holiday runs from April 12–16. To accommodate people travelling up-country to visit their hometowns and to stimulate domestic tourism, the Cabinet designated Thursday, April 12 as an additional holiday on top of the usual April 13–16 holiday time. Gen. Prawit has told the agencies to learn from past statistics to identify accident causes and try to minimise them. He said the authorities would also launch awareness campaigns about drunk driving, use of safety belts and wearing helmets. Most Thais celebrate the traditional Thai New Year and enjoy the water-splashing festival. A few tips for first-timers: it will be hot, but wear or bring a light shell if you don’t want to end up shivering from being doused repeatedly with ice water. Don’t drink, keep your wits about you and.. don’t ride in the back of pickup trucks!

Here’s a longer discussion about safety in Thailand:

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Vern Lovic, Thailand’s snake expert, wrote me this explanation of his new book, Keep Snakes Out!: Probably no other animal that is frequently found in a home scares people as much as snakes! Here in Thailand, we have a serious snake problem. Recently my friend confronted a king cobra climbing his front door. It’s really no joke here…

For ten years I have been answering questions by email, phone, and social media about how to keep snakes out of homes, businesses, schools and nurseries, and out of yards and away from other property.

For years I offered this free service – but finally, as the requests have peaked to around 1,000 per year, I just cannot keep up  any longer with this and keep performing snake rescues at people’s homes. So, I’m writing this book to help me reclaim my life back. This book will help me free up a dozen hours a week or more. I’ll answer your questions about the best things you can do to keep snakes in nature – away from you, your yard, and property. I’ll put everything I know here – and you take it from there.

Here in Thailand we have around 220 snake species. That’s a LOT OF SNAKES that can find their way into homes, yards, schools, vehicles, and tree houses. Start with this book to eliminate as much as possible any means for a snake to get close to your home. Head over to ThailandSnakes.com to read more about snakes in Thailand that you need to avoid. We have a couple of other ebooks – one free – you might want to get a copy of. Stay safe! – Vern

Snakes, like most animals, are emotional creatures. The emotion we humans usually see is anger. It’s the most visible of all species’ emotions and we tend to elicit snakes’ anger by doing stupid things. If you want to see an angry snake, check out the video below. If you humiliate a non-venomous snake – by, for example, using it to frighten people and make them scream – then put the snake back down on the ground, it will often stay there for a long time, clearly displaying its resentment.

Thailand has 200 snake species of which 60 are venomous. There are venomous (not poisonous) snakes everywhere here.  Recently I watched a racer swim across the river then haul herself out of the water onto a lily pad to warm up and dry off. She was beautiful. Thai snakes, like most, are terrified of humans. Thai snakes have a protector and friend: expat Vern Lovic who lives in Southern Thailand – is an interpreter between snakes and humans (that’s Vern’s picture of the beautiful red tailed racer, above) and runs a great Thai snakes website.

It’s just as well snakes have a friend: I have snakes in my front yard. My neighbor has twice had cobras in her outdoor kitchen, one expat told me he has a family of kraits living in his storage shed. Vern adds that vipers love bushes and trees near water and walkways. In other words, there are enough snakes in Thailand that it’s worth learning about them. Vern has made this easy by providing a free guide to Thailand’s snakes. Just click here and download it.

If you’re keen to get to know our local snakes, Vern makes that easy. He’s running a Snakes of Thailand field trip mid-year. To join the field trip, click here. Here’s that video of an angry snake:

https://youtu.be/qn5dEtAzb3E

And here’s a video of a remarkable escape:

https://wp.me/p4lpu0-1twDog escapes from python in Thailand

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A dear friend (not a client) who labored long and hard to make his Thai restaurant a success (#1 on TripAdvisor – hard to pull off) was recently approached by his Thai landlord’s  son. He had noticed that the restaurant was constantly sold out. He deduced that my friend had cheated his mother when she signed the 5-year lease – though the restaurant building had been abandoned for years before my friend leased it.

The son demanded that my friend sign a new lease, more than doubling the rent and that, if my friend refused, he would ’cause trouble’ in the restaurant. The son holds the double advantage of sharing his mother’s high social standing and of being known to hang out with thugs.

So my friend decided to move his restaurant elsewhere.

If the son is true to form he will now start a restaurant in the same location and wonder why it fails within 6 months. That is part of Thai commercial landlords’ pattern, too. It’s not just restaurants that are in danger of this. 3 years ago another expat friend started a very hip coffee shop-bookstore and the place was jammed from 10 am to midnight on the first day. The next morning the landlord arrived with a new lease.

And yes, the landlord did start a coffee-shop bookstore after my friend vacated. And it failed in 4 months.

If you intend to enter into an agreement with a commercial Thai landlord, please contact me first. There’s a right way and a wrong way to go into such deals that has nothing to do with what’s written on the lease document. This is the kind of minefield that we routinely navigate for our Concierge clients. That’s the point of having a concierge, after all: to help you through the local scene in comfort and safety.

Update: two years later, my friend’s new restaurant in town is booming. His previous location is still empty. Landlords in Thailand remain as much a mystery as ever!

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Happily, everyone pulled together. His Thai business partner found his contacts list on his phone, a brother was summoned from the UK, a lawyer found who had the unsigned documents, and it got worked out. But it required 5 people who didn’t know each other spending a week to make the same thing happen because they all wanted the intended beneficiary to get everything possible from the estate. If any of us had objected the entire affair (including the client’s body!) would have remained frozen.

My guy charges 5,000 Baht for Making a Thai Will. I haven’ checked any other providers because, having seen him in action in this case, I wouldn’t have anyone else involved. He made everything happen. And remember, he was working with documents that were unsigned and hadn’t even paid for the will when he dies. For that kind of service, $5K sounds cheap. Here’s the information you’ll need:

1. Passport copies – yourself, the beneficiaries and Executor
2. Address – yourself and the beneficiaries
3. Assets – what will go where / to who
4. Copy of Bank book
5. Copy of car / bike book
6. Would yo be cremated?
7. Who is the executor?

OK, here’s some straight talk about making a will in Thailand:

I’m Making a Thai Will…and so should you–especially if you drive in Thailand!

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Bed Linens. Thai linens are pretty awful, for some reason. The towels are bearable, but the sheets are rough and uncomfortable. Even though China makes most of the world’s linens, there are no decent sheets imported to Thailand. So bring your own sheets and remember that Thai Mattress sizes are different from ours:

• US Standard King — 76 x 80 inches = 198 x 203 cm.
• Thailand King — 72 x 78 inches = 183 x 198 cm

You can, of course, get a custom-cut latex mattress in Thailand to fit your sheets, but you’d also have to order a custom-made bed. These options are relatively inexpensive but cheapest by far is to have your foreign sheets altered by one of Thailand’s thousands of seamstresses – whose stalls can be found on any roadside. Expect to pay less than 300 Baht ($10)and wait less than 48 hours for the work to be done. Here are the sheets I got from Amazon that work well in Thailand’s conditions (and laundries).

Kitchen Knives: Thailand’s growing middle class does not cook. Cooking is not a Thai pastime in the cities, and back on the farm it’s an entirely different affair. Thais prefer to pick up their meals at roadside stalls, especially since indoor kitchens are relatively unknown here. But if you plan to have a Western kitchen and do some cooking, as I do, you’ll need some decent knives. And decent knives are all imported here, and start at $100/3000 Bt. So bring your own. Once again, I turned to Amazon for my standard 12” kitchen knife and bread knife.

Scissors: You’ll be surprised by how often you use scissors here. And appalled by the quality of Thai scissors. So bring your own. Heavy duty, so you can cut anything with them. These are what I use and recommend: Fiskars Heavy Duty Scissors. Good bang for the buck, They stay sharp. Don’t rust – a big deal in these humid parts.

Here’s a video with some more good suggestions about what to bring with you when you move to Thailand:

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A History of Southeast Asia: Critical Crossroads 

Southeast Asia can fall between the two stools of China and India, overlooked or viewed merely as a reflection of either or both of these two major historical, political and commercial entities. It is, says Anthony Reid in A History of Southeast Asia: Critical Crossroads, often seen as the awkward residue after the great civilizations of India and China have been studied, or at best the sphere of interaction between the two.
But it is a region with a population that far exceeds that of either the European Union or North America and – in the South China Sea – is currently the focus of one of the world’s most serious strategic confrontations.
Understanding the region is therefore not just a matter of intellectual curiosity but also of considerable topical importance. Despite its textbook-like appearance, History is eminently readable. It succeeds at both providing a broad-brush overview of this complex region, presenting it from within, identifying and tracing major themes, while at the same time delivering a wealth of fascinating and intriguing detail.
Reid is particularly strong on the less regularly covered pre-modern periods. One interesting takeaway about the early history of Southeast Asia is its relative “statelessness:” the majority of the people in the region lived outside formal state structures until quite recently. This was related to a second interesting fact that pre-modern Southeast Asia seems to have been sparsely populated, with population densities in 1,600 of less than five per square kilometer outside only a few sizable concentrations:
… humans had been continuously present in the Asian tropics longer than in most parts of the planet, surviving the last ice age there, and developing agriculture some 5,000 years ago. Why then did Southeast Asia’s demographic catch-up with the denser populations of Europe, India, China, and Japan occur only in the last two centuries?
“Natural disasters,” concludes Reid.
Southeast Asia, he writes, is both “not-China” and “not-India.” Its distinctiveness found expression not just in politics and demographics but even in such everyday items as clothing:
Southeast Asians were much slower than their neighbors to adopt sewn garments that required the production or acquisition of needles… even with the pressure of Islam and Christianity after 1500, the carefully oiled and perfumed skin of the upper body remained in many areas the ultimate sign of cultivation. Order a copy here..

Sightseeing by Rattawut Lapcharoensap

Rattawut was born in Chicago and grew up in Bangkok. He now lives in New York.

In the poignant title story a son and his mother, who is rapidly going blind, go on a trip to see their country as tourists. In Priscilla the Cambodian, a boy learns of the hostility towards migrants. And in the novella-length Cockfighter, a family is almost torn apart by a father’s obsession with betting, bird-fighting and getting even with the town bully.

“Pussy and elephants. That’s all these people want,” says a hotel owner who caters for farangs (Thai for whites). That sets the tone for an east-west culture clash in the opening tale of this lively debut collection of short stories set in contemporary Thailand. It’s a fresh, provocative take on the country’s beauty and bleakness – without a hint of exoticism.

The first-person narration in each of the seven stories immediately draws the reader in, whether it’s about cultural discord, coming of age and the loss of innocence, small-town corruption or social divisions. The narrators, mostly young Thais, are finding their way in an unequal and irrational adult world.

An acute observer, Rattawut makes a candid and witty tour guide to the darker side of the “land of smiles”. And despite an undercurrent of anger and frustration, he avoids pamphleteering.

A History of Thailand by Chris Baker and Pasuk Phongpaichit

This engaging and accessible history focuses on the economic, social and political forces that shaped contemporary Thailand. Baker and Pasuk reveal how ruling nobles, unfree labourers, Chinese migrants and Buddhism become part of the mix as the country is transformed from a culturally and linguistically disparate region into a homogenised nation-state under a strong monarchy.

Although Thailand avoids direct colonial rule, it doesn’t escape foreign machinations. French and British territorial ambitions have to be parlayed, the second world war brings Japanese occupation, and the US underwrites dictatorship and recruits Thailand as an ally during the cold war.

The military and Washington also oversee a revival of the monarchy following its partial eclipse in 1932, when it was forced into a constitutional role (today Thailand has severe lese-majesty laws).

The authors recount how, over the years, nationalists, army generals, communist guerrillas, businessmen and civil society movements have all attempted to capture the state and bend it to their beliefs. The right, seeking to impose its formula of nation, religion and king, comes up against reformers pushing for a more liberal, democratic state. The battle remains unresolved, as the recent military coup attests to.

Baker taught Asian history at Cambridge University and has lived in Thailand for more than 20 years. Pasuk teaches at Chulalongkorn University in Bangkok.

Four Reigns by Kukrit Pramoj

Kukrit’s epic novel follows one woman’s life spanning the reigns of four kings – Rama V to Rama VIII – from the 1890s to the second world war.

At the age of 10, Phloi goes to live in the royal palace in Bangkok with her mother, who serves as a minor courtier. Phloi’s eventful life inside and outside the palace – as daughter, sister, wife and mother – reflects the enormous changes taking place in the country. Traditional Siam is buffeted by historic events at home and abroad – a palace revolution, two world wars, Japanese occupation, allied bombing – as it evolves into modern Thailand.

After the absolute monarchs are forced to become constitutional rulers, “the air is thick with politics”. That, along with increasing western influence and the turbulence of the second world war, causes fissures in society that intrude into Phloi’s family.

This leisurely paced novel is both intriguing and entertaining. And despite being bathed in conservative nostalgia, offers a fascinating insight into the country.

Four Reigns is regarded as a classic in Thailand and has often been staged and serialised on TV.

Kukrit was something of a renaissance man – Thai prime minister, journalist and newspaper proprietor, Hollywood film actor and classical dancer. He died in 1995.

In case you’re inspired, here’s a video about books on learning to speak Thai:

More Best Books About Thailand

How can you do better than to read the classic, Making Money in Thailand?  It describes 22 ways that Westerners who retire in Thailand can (and DO) make extra income. From legal employment to buying a business to starting one. Covers budgets, profit margins, on-line and off-line businesses, visas, legalities, business culture, import and export, and a range of stories and videos by and about Thai expats making extra money,  and more.

• Thailand Novels – Visit Chiang Mai Online – Books about Thailand. English-language writers in thailand. Thriller And Adventure novels From Or Set In Thailand … Thriller and adventure novels from or set in Thailand shopping in Thailand Learn Thai at DCO books.
• Books about Thailand | Richard Barrow in Thailand – Books about Thailand. September 28, 2013. By Richard Barrow. I was in Asia Books this afternoon and I thought you might be interested in these four books. 20130928-064400 pm.jpg. 19th edition of “Bangkok Guide” is now available at Asia …
• Camera’s deployed in Thailand’s Khlong Saeng Wildlife … – His books are available on this web site www.brucekekule.com In addition to publishing gorgeous and informative books about Thailand’s last and best wild places, Bruce is likely the world’s leading photographer of the rare …
• Two books about Thailand | The Lost Boy – In every foreign-language book store in Thailand there is a section devoted to books written by foreigners about their new home. I sometimes pick one up and.
• USDOJ: Alliance One International Inc. and Universal … – The charges relate to bribes paid to Thai government officials to secure contracts with the Thailand Tobacco Monopoly, a Thai government agency, for the sale of tobacco leaf. … of Virginia charging Universal Brazil with conspiring to violate the anti-bribery provisions and books and records provisions of the FCPA, and with violating the anti-bribery provisions of the FCPA relating to bribes paid to Thailand Tobacco Monopoly employees for the sale of Brazilian tobacco.

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Dear Neil and Bruce,

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What Happens When Thai Immigration Visits Me?

The USA and the UK are relaxed about foreigners but, when Thai Immigration visits me I find that’s not true in Thailand.  Your registered Thai address turns out to be more important than some people think.

Chonburi immigration is the first province to start insisting that resident farangs stay where they’ve registered and finding offenders 4,000 baht. Officers there have been checking their records against foreigners residing in the area then fining people for being in the wrong location. In September seven people were each fined 4,000 baht for not being where they registered. Last Tuesday Canadian Luc Lafreniere had to post up 4,000 baht for not living at his registered address. This is not arbitrary: the fines are in accordance with regulations issued in 1998. Chonburi immigration are also fining people offering accommodation to foreigners who fail to report guests to them within 24 hours, so AirBnB hosts might want to pay attention. Yesterday a manageress at the local Pratumnak Inn was fined 1,600 baht for failing to report that a Russian guest  was staying in the building. Chonburi Immigration calls the program “Good Guys In, Bad Guys Out”. Expats call it a nuisance

Thais know that their country is the most wonderful, beautiful place on earth (since that’s what they’re taught at school and on TV) and everyone would like to live here. There’s a lot of truth to that belief. Thailand is a kind of tropical paradise. The beaches really are wonderful, the girls really are friendly (really, really friendly) and the food really is quote wonderful. Why go abroad, since foreign visas are so difficult for Thais to obtain? So Thais stay home and add their weight to the 25,000,000 foreign visitors who tour the country every year. Thais are their own best customers for tourism.

But what about those foreigners who want to stay? The law requires them to be self-supporting and law abiding. Problem is, millions of them are penniless refugees and migrants who sleep on a floor with a dozen others and do the hard, dirty work that Thai men and women disdain.  Given Thailand’s long, unmarked borders, tracking those millions would be a herculean task. So Immigration officers wisely devote most of their attention to farangs (white Europeans). If farangs’ papers are not in order, their reasoning goes, it’s likely that they’ll either be offered a bribe or get a commendation from the Bureau for catching the offender. It’s a win-win.

Two polite, smartly-uniformed (and very cute). English-speaking Thai Immigration officers came calling this week. They were doing house checks at farangs‘ registered addresses and my Swiss neighbor made it worth their while to ride down to my street (doubling up on one scooter, but both can claim mileage reimbursement, of course). They found my papers were in order and we got to chatting. They were clearly curious about my standard of living, “How much do you pay for your house?”.

“Ten thousand Baht”, I responded.

They shook their heads in amazement. A single man, living alone in a 3-bedroom house. Why a dozen Thais could live there in air-conditioned comfort! And he  pays more rent than Immigration officers’ salary! Farangs really are rich.

Chonburi immigration is the first province to start insisting that resident farangs stay where they’ve registered and finding offenders 4,000 baht. Officers there have been checking their records against foreigners residing in the area then fining people for being in the wrong location. In September seven people were each fined 4,000 baht for not being where they registered. Last Tuesday Canadian Luc Lafreniere had to post up 4,000 baht for not living at his registered address. This is not arbitrary: the fines are in accordance with regulations issued in 1998. Chonburi immigration are also fining people offering accommodation to foreigners who fail to report guests to them within 24 hours, so AirBnB hosts might want to pay attention. Yesterday a manageress at the local Pratumnak Inn was fined 1,600 baht for failing to report that a Russian guest  was staying in the building. Chonburi Immigration calls the program “Good Guys In, Bad Guys Out”. Expats call it a nuisance.

Here’s a video to prove how rich I am:

My Chiang Mai House #2: Plants and Flowers Arrive.

Coincidentally, the next day I discovered that my US passport had expired, so I went down to the Consulate for the first time. You can read my suggestions for visiting the US Consulate in Chiang Mai here.

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Dear Francois,

In addition to the pitfalls inherent in all relationships, you are facing two that do not exist where you live: legal and cultural. The legal pitfalls are that you cannot own land in Thailand and, though as it is written Thai Common Law is identical to British Common Law, its administration is nothing like Britain’s. In a case between a Thai and a foreigner, Thai law is almost always interpreted in favor of the Thai party, regardless of evidence. There are exceptions, of course, but that’s the rule of thumb.

So if you want to find a mate in Thailand, I suggest you come here, rent a nice house for 12 months, get to know the family, and look around for a suitable piece of land. There’s no rush. During that time, talk to experienced British lawyers who’ve lived and practiced here for 20 years. Figure out the local customs. Figure out your relationship. Figure out the family (including the yaba-addicted cousin who’s a danger to himself and everyone else and needs a place to sleep). Then, suitably informed – and armed with instruments like usufruct codicils – proceed as you see fit.

During that 12 months, see if you can figure out the culture you’ll be living in because, as soon as your new house is built (possibly long before that) you’ll be living with your wife’s family. That’s how Thais live. Don’t try to prevent it. Let it happen and see how well it suits you. Some guys love it and wouldn’t live any other way. Others find it intolerable.

That 12 months will help you adjust to different cultural attitudes to lying, cheating and stealing. This has nothing to do with your new partner, of course, but rather with relatives who see you as a member of their extended family and treat you accordingly. Again, it’s not a better or worse way of organizing things, but it sure as hell is different, and you want to learn how well you can tolerate the difference – for the rest of your life.
Apart from that, Thailand can be a Paradise and I love it. I’m beginning to understand the culture and its attitude to us farangs and I’m OK with it and I still love it and love the Thais the way they are. But it has taken me some years and misadventures to reach this point. Here’s Aimie explaining how Thai women are taught to think about relationships: don’t say you weren’t warned!

For more about Thai mates, why not read up on the subject. Here are some good books:

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I have been visiting Thailand as a tourist for over twenty years.  I shall briefly consider whether retirement at fifty is worth it and, if so, why Thailand.   By retirement, I do not mean literally “retiring” from life.  Let’s call it “semi-retirement”.

Life at fifty

Retirement is an opportunity to do what you want and according to when you want.  If you are not doing what you really wish to do at fifty then you are in danger of dying unfulfilled.  Before you think that the average person lives to about seventy-five years in the so-called “developed” world, give a passing thought to those you know who have died early or who have suffered life altering events for the worse before reaching fifty.  My mother’s early death and my own health scares cause me to reflect.

At fifty you can probably expect another fifteen to twenty years of reasonably healthy life.  You cannot take your assets or savings with you after death and, aside of giving some inheritance to family members, you should consider spending some of your capital in doing what you wish; in what is, effectively, the last third of your life.   Do not hold out for longer lasting medical treatments or “miracle drugs” or perpetual life; they are years away and world “unknowns” do not support the idea of sustainable life forever.

Assuming some good health, fifty is old enough to have experience and some capital behind you; and young enough to have some time and opportunity ahead.  So, fifty it is.

By retirement, I mean an opportunity to do what you want.  Getting started is often the hardest bit.  By all means plan ahead – to do otherwise is silly.

Having a partner can help but is not essential.  By the time you are fifty your kids should be nearing self-sufficiency; if not, then (save for “late” mums and dads) it is about time that the kids are.

There are plenty of things to do to keep busy and/or earn income enough to pay some of your expenses after fifty: charity work, teaching, TESOL/TEFL, life-coaching, self-employment, home businesses on-line, long-term travel, ex pat clubs, recreations.  I plan to take a TESOL/TEFL course in Bangkok or Phuket; something to fall back on, subject to visa requirements.  English language skills are in great demand in Asia generally – just visit any college or school and see.

There is no easy answer to how much capital you need to have saved before you retire to Thailand.  Personal circumstances are different; as are life-styles.  Little is to be gained by too much information overload on this point and there are enough financial gurus out there (via a simple google search) to gain an idea about how much one needs to retire.  Some of the ex pat forum website comments can make for amusing financial reading as experienced ex pat commentators bring the “newbies” up to speed.

For what it is worth, I think a minimum US$500,000 is desirable, probably not including the roof over your head or your accommodation costs.  Double that would be good.  Over US$2 million and much more and you are doing nicely.  Under US$500,000 and I think you are cutting it fine but possible.

Big “unknown” costs can include – health, unplanned air travel, interest rates versus inflation and losses on future currency exchange rates.  Look at the recent Euro and Aus. $ volatility.  Road accidents also appear to be quite prevalent in parts of Thailand and motor bikes a particular concern.  Friends tell me if they get seriously sick or injured, they visit private hospitals but try to avoid overnight stays that can be expensive.  I once visited a private hospital in Bangkok for a “skin rash” – blood tests, anti-biotics and a good local doctor cost me about US$200 (all in 2 hours).

Think about health and critical illness insurance but neither come cheap.

If you are sensible, a single person should be able to live on approximately US$2,000 per month in Thailand (including accommodation); a couple a bit more but with some economy of scale to be had.  It can be done cheaper.  However, allow for “events” and some front-loaded costs.  I aim to budget for about US$2,000 per month (including, my rent costs).  I do not drink or smoke, which will help.

Why Thailand

At fifty you can obtain a retirement visa, subject to applicable laws and criteria.  The income and capital requirements are not too strict.   Opening a bank account is relatively straight forward.  Pick your bank wisely (big and/or with a foreign association is generally better) and check your “depositor protection” status and bank charges as a resident foreigner.

Work opportunities will be limited but a good immigration lawyer and/or visa agent can assist; there are plenty on the ground in the big cities.  Godfree’s “Thailand Retirement Helpers” can assist here.

Thailand has a wonderful climate, provided you are not adverse to some heat.  It can rain some but often in predictable daily patterns you can plan around.  You rarely need to worry about more than one layer of clothing.  As a tourist, I normally only pack a few pairs of running shorts, tee-shirts, trainers and travel on the  plane in “smart casual” attire (should I need something to look presentable in, while on holiday).

The culture is friendly, provided you “return” smiles and show respect.

Local food is abundant, inexpensive and generally healthy.  Food costs in many parts of the world will become scarce and more expensive.  Thailand is an enormous rice grower and has a natural food growing climate (like Malaysia, Vietnam, parts of China).   Commodities and food will become even more important.   The next twenty-five years may well see a move back to farming.  It is unlikely Thailand will see major widespread water shortages.

Thailand has a relatively young population compared to many aging countries but one that is generally respectful of age.  Thailand is quite IT savvy but lags (say) Hong Kong and Singapore.

While there are political uncertainties in Thailand, and have been for the last few decades, these do not affect foreign retirees’ quality of life by and large.  I was in Bangkok at the time of some political unrest in 2010 and 2014 and never felt unsafe; in fact, quite the contrary.  Those incidents were (at worse) at times inconvenient.

Indeed, Thailand is by and large a peaceful country and culture.  There is some petty crime and some less pleasant aspects, but they are a fact of most modern life.  In over twenty years of visiting many parts of Thailand, I have never seen any serious crime; the crime I have seen has almost all been night time drink and tourist related.  A more recent phenomenon in Bangkok is foreign scam artists; never invest in these “get rich quick” promises and quietly (and quickly) move on.  When out and about at night generally stay ground floor and avoid “upstairs” and basement joints.

There is much to do in Thailand.  The climate and varied landscape allow this.  Water sports (some of the longest coastal areas in the world), cycling, walking, golf, cookery classes, Buddhist retreats, temple retreats, many martial arts, meditation, many nocturnal activities; the list goes on.  You should not be bored.  I once had ballroom “dance lessons” with a professional dance instructor in Bangkok, who turned out to be a “ladyboy” and a great dancer (and nice with it); for those interested, I still tried to take the lead.  “She” charged Bhat 1000 per hour (just dance lessons).

Some life lessons

My first impressions of Thailand over some twenty years ago were not all good.  However, I came to see Thailand for what it is.  In short, a respectful culture and way of life but with modern amenities and facilities (including healthcare).   Do not underestimate the benefit of a good climate.   If you are single, there is abundant opportunity to meet a partner; just be careful and take your time.  Two rules normally hold true: (i) do not buy into property without first living in the locality and looking around for about a year and (ii) the same goes for finding a partner (business, personal or otherwise).

While you can place trust generally, do your due diligence (and avoid the foreign scam artists).  You will generally win Thailand over by showing respect.

Good luck.     PM

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